Kiss Me GoodBye And Sleep
by KyosBeads13
Summary: Spoilers for chapter 465 of the manga. Inu-Yasha.. You're looking me in the eyes and.. You're crying? After all the awful and terrible things I've done and said, you're still here, crying over me? Kikyo's reflection on life and death. Song Fic, InuXKik


**A/N:** Spoilers for chapter 465 of the manga if you have not read it._ Well, getting ready for play practice a while back, I heard this song and Kikyo and Inu-Yasha totally popped into my mind. And I'm not really a Kikyo Inu-Yasha fan so this is her basically reflecting on her life with Inu-Yasha as she dies for the last and final time in his arms. I'm trying to stay true to her character and yet make it a bit more dramatic. Thank you for reading, reviews will be much appreciated. _

**DISCLAIMER:** _I do not own Inu-Yasha at all, it belongs to Rumiko Takahashi. Also, I do not own the song, "Sleep," by My Chemical Romance. So don't sue me. _

**Kiss Me Good-bye And Sleep**

It happened so long ago, fifty years? That's a long time. But it seems that neither of us truly lived through it. You slept and I had died, it was destined for that moment to be the last one we shared together. The bitter hate burning inside both of us was enough to be satisfied with such an ending as what occurred.

_Some say now suffer all the children  
And walk away a savior or a madman and polluted,  
From gutter institutions.  
Don't you breathe on me,  
Undeserving of your sympathy.  
'Cause there ain't no way that I'm sorry for what I did. _

I was a strong priestess before I met you, Inu-Yasha. I never let my emotions get in the way of my duty, I had to be cold, and follow the path of righteousness.

And then that night occurred.

I was fighting demons that night when you came across me, bloody from battle and exhausted from draining my powers. I couldn't lift my head at all, and just lay there waiting for you to attack me. Waiting for that final stab in the heart that would end all my training and hard work, just waiting for death to arrive. And that's when I heard my name being called, and your frantic footsteps to get away. I had no idea who you were until a few days later when you came to get the jewel from me, and that's where it all happened. We got to know each other, respect each other, care for each other, and that truly is the biggest downfall we had, caring too much.

That day, when I was to give you the jewel, I was late. I ran to the field fearing that you had already gone, when "you" struck me in the shoulder, giving me the fatal wound.

_And through it all,  
How could you cry for me?  
'Cause I don't feel bad about it.  
So shut your eyes, kiss me good-bye.  
And sleep.  
The hardest part, is letting go of  
Your dreams._

I remember how painful it was to take that arrow from my quiver, not only because of the injury I had sustained, but knowing the task that had to be performed. At that point in time, I had no idea that you were as innocent as I...

And then I saw the Shikon No Tama in your hand.

All my anger, sadness, and rage built up in me when I saw you attempt to get away with it. Bringing my arrow to my bow, I placed it in the worn out notch and drew the string back. I saw you leap into the air, not even noticing my presence and then:

"Inu-Yasha!" Your name rang out into the forest as you turned and looked at me with wide golden eyes. I released the arrow, staying in my stance and watched as it struck you through the heart. The jewel clattered to the ground and I stumbled forward towards it, taking it in my hands and glaring up at you coldly. I hated you... I _despised_ you. Every fiber of my being stung with unexplainable hate. The footsteps of the villagers approached quickly, Kaede leaned down and put a hand on my shoulder. I looked straight ahead at you, holding the jewel to my chest.

"Kikyo... How could..-" You looked at me for the final time with your hand drawn out, then fell limp before my eyes.

"Sister-!" Kaede's voice died on her as I looked to her with as much pain as I could manage in my eyes.

"Kaede... Take the jewel and burn it with my remains. I will take it with me to the other side to be certain that no evil will ever grasp it again!" These were my last moments of life. And even so, the only thing I could think about was how I would be with you once again, that's all I wanted. I was perfectly okay with giving my life up to be with you forever. Gripping the jewel, I felt my body start to slip away from me.

My memories of us flooded back. How you'd accompany me on long journeys, talk to me well into night fall, and that day on the dock. When you looked me in the eyes, and spoke the truth. When you simply whispered my name...

"Sister Kikyo!"

And then, it was black. Until I was revived.

When I looked up, the first thing that I saw was you. That burning hate that I was left with returned in an instant. How are you standing before me? I did not pull out that arrow! A splitting pain then erupted in my shoulder. Dabbing my hand at the blood running down my arm, I could stay silent no more.

"Why did you betray me, Inu-Yasha!"

_A drink, for the horror that I'm in.  
For the good guys and the bad guys.  
For the monsters that I've been.  
Three cheers for tyranny.  
Unapologetic apathy.  
'Cause there ain't no way that I'm coming back again. _

However, along my travels, I found out that the information that Kagome had given me was indeed truthful. The half demon Naraku had pitted us both against each other in order to steal both the jewel and my feelings. He was, of course, successful in making me despise you; but soon, the hate I held for you in the pit of my heart started to fade. I saw that you were going to try again, that you never wanted anything like this to happen.

But I still hated you. I was brought back to life to hate you, not to in some miraculous way, be reunited with you. I was brought back on selfish means and am now forced to live (and die) with selfish means. I was so selfish that I toyed with you, in fact. Each time I saw you, you promised to protect me. When I finally really did need your help, when I _wanted_ your help, it was too late...

Now, Naraku's poison has me on my last limb. Once again I'm going to be torn away from you by him...

_And through it all,  
How could you cry for me?  
'Cause I don't feel bad about it.  
So shut your eyes, kiss me good-bye.  
And sleep.  
The hardest part, the awful things that  
I've seen._

Right now, I'm trying to keep my eyes open, you're talking to me. I can hear you, but you're starting to sound distant... You're looking me in the eyes and ... you're crying? After all the awful and terrible things I've done and said, you're still here, crying over me?

"Inu-Yasha... That's the first time I've ever seen you just start crying like that. I'm surprised." I'm trying to keep a smile on for you, I don't want this good-bye to occur like the last time.

"Kikyo, I wasn't able to save you again! I've let you down again, Kikyo!" Your tears are sliding onto my face. I'm only wondering why you aren't seeing why I'm smiling though.

_Just sleep. _

"Inu-Yasha you're with me right now aren't you? That's all I cold ask of you. You kept your promise as far as I'm concerned..." Managing to get a weak laugh out I feel you pulling me towards you more.

"K-Kikyo..." As your voice cracks, you bring my head up to meet your lips in a bittersweet kiss.

_Just sleep. _

Now I can feel death starting to take me away, but it isn't the cold death that I have already experienced. No, this one is warmer, you're here with me, Inu-Yasha. We never hated each other... I don't know how I could be so blind and believe for an instant that I could hate you.

"Inu-Yasha...I..." My voice won't cooperate anymore. I just smile at you as a last gesture.

**Just sleep. **

"Kikyo..." I hear as the last bit of warmth escapes me and I settle into your body... I'm finally at peace, Inu-Yasha...

Thank you...


End file.
